Were I to make all the apologies necessary to atone for my late
negligence, you would justly say you had received a petition instead of a letter, as it
would be filled with prayers for forgiveness; but instead of this, I will acknowledge my
sins at once, and I trust to your friendship and generosity rather than to my own
excuses. Though my health is not perfectly re-established, I am out of all danger, and
have recovered every thing but my spirits, which are subject to depression. You will be
astonished to hear I have lately written to Delawarre, for the purpose of explaining (as far as possible without
involving some old friends of mine in the business) the cause of
my behaviour to him during my last residence at Harrow (nearly two years ago), which you
will recollect was rather ‘en cavalier.’ Since that period I have discovered he was treated with injustice,
both by those who misrepresented his conduct, and by me in consequence of their
suggestions. I have therefore made all the reparation in my power, by apologizing for my
mistake, though with very faint hopes of success; indeed I never expected any answer,
but desired one for form’s sake; that has not yet arrived,
and most probably
A. D. 1807. | LIFE OF LORD BYRON. | 83 |
“My time has lately been much occupied with very different pursuits. I have been transporting a servant*, who cheated me,—rather a disagreeable event:—performing in private theatricals;—publishing a volume of poems (at the request of my friends, for their perusal);—making love,—and taking physic. The two last amusements have not had the best effect in the world; for my attentions have been divided amongst so many fair damsels, and the drugs I swallow are of such variety in their composition, that between Venus and Æsculapius I am harassed to death. However, I have still leisure to devote some hours to the recollections of past, regretted friendships, and in the interval to take the advantage of the moment, to assure you how much I am, and ever will be, my dearest Clare,