The first heavy sorrow of her life came upon Lady Morgan a few months after her marriage. Her father, whose health had long been breaking, died in the early spring. He lived to witness the happiness and prosperity of both his children, and he died at the house of Lady Clarke, surrounded by every care and kindness that affection could bestow. The following letters tell of Lady Morgan’s grief. The natural position between a parent and child had, in their case, been reversed. Ever since her mother’s death she had felt that it was for her to take care of her father, instead of her father taking care of her; but this did not interfere with her own romantic admiration for him, nor the affectionate respect with which she regarded him.
’Tis an excess of selfishness in me to write to you
under my present feelings, as, except to detail my own
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They allow me to breakfast and dine in my own sitting-room, which is a great comfort, and I have not seen a creature since my misfortune, but Lady Abercorn, who is all affection and pity. They want me to drive to Derry, or somewhere, with Morgan; but where can I go that the image of my dead, dear papa, will not follow me? What trouble, what expence, what suffering and sadness you must have had? God bless you, for all; but goodness is of no avail. If my dearest, suffering Livy will not come to me, I will go to her, and this scene would be a change and a benefit to her.
My dearest Clarke,
I remember buying or paying for a watch last summer, for poor, dear
papa,—I wish you would wear it! I have just had a petition from a
starving English actor and his family, travelling through here, that almost
reconciled me to an event that put the object I loved beyond the reach of
poverty or care. I am so altered in the course of three days you would not know
me. Livy was such a blessing to the last
to her poor father. Has Mrs. Doyle, the
Lefanus, or any of her friendly friends been with her?
Morgan, who is all tenderness, and
goodness, and generosity, is bent on re-uniting me to Livy
at any sacrifice. This business has fallen like a thunderbolt on me. I knew not
what step to take. It is odd, that when Livy wrote word of
papa’s talking of going to the theatre, Morgan said
it was the worst symptom that had appeared yet,
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God bless and preserve you,
PS.—Dear Livy, she is in no condition to write to you, and would only increase your sufferings, nor can I say more than that the sight of her wild and tearless eyes almost distracts me; however, you must both give only a short season to sorrow. I would not say to you do not lament, but bear in mind, my dearest Livy, that after all this is a most merciful dispensation of Providence, especially to the object of our lamentation. What is more now to the purpose, come down and see what a good husband I am, and what an affectionate brother you have; change of scene and of air will be of the greatest use to you, and if the most perfect sympathy have any consolation, you will find it in stopping with Syd. and your affectionate Morgy.
Your message to Sir
Charles would have insured you an immediate answer to your
letter, if there were no other inducement to write to you; and that you have
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Everything that you say about Dublin is very seductive,
but we really are in a pitiable state of hesitation at present. They have not
the remotest idea that we can or will leave them as long as they remain in
Ireland, and yet they talk of that being a year or two. If we (what they would call) desert them, we shall risk the
loss of their friendship, which would indeed be a loss; but if we remain we
lose time, and it is quite fit that Morgan should establish himself soon somewhere. Add to this
that they, I believe, have a real affection for us; but we are dying to be in
our own little shabby house, and are tired of solitary splendours, and of the
eternal representation of high life, and you will then believe that we are
rather in a
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“To each his suffering;” you have had
your portion, and it would have been unfair and unjust to have written to you
under the influence of my sadness, and have drawn from you an unavailing
sympathy at the moment you have been so actively and beneficially engaged in
soothing and comforting my dear Olivia,
who feels your goodness in her “heart of hearts.” You are a true friend,—I have always thought so,—I
have always said so, and every year of our friendship has given me fresh reason
to confirm my opinion. The dearest and strongest tie, which time, nature,
habit, and acts of reciprocal affection can form, has been wrenched from my
heart; I ought long since to have been, and yet was not, prepared for it. It
was a dreadful break up to the feelings; it is so much of life broken off. A
host of dearly remembered events, feelings, and associations, are necessarily
gone with it. Were it possible I could ever again love anything so well, I can
never again love anything so long. The best point of existence with me is over,
and new ties and new affections must be light in their hold, and feeble in
their influence, compared to those “which grew with the growth and
strengthened with the years.” My dear husband,
Olivia, yourself, and one or two more objects
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We have lately added to our party,
“The travelled Thane, Athenian
Aberdeen,” |
What think you of the state of public affairs? our letters to-day, from England, say that the opposition still hold out, though offered six places out of twelve in the Cabinet, or seven out of fourteen. What a bouleversement in the state of things when stars and garters go a begging!! and commoner’s misses refuse to become princesses!!* The Cabinet remains empty
* Alluding to the gossip of the day that the Duke of Clarence had been refused by Miss Tilney Long, the luckless “great heiress” of the period. |
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We expect Livy
here, but she seems either unwilling or unable to leave home. We have no chance
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Sir Charles’s desire to know you increases daily. Shall we ever all meet again and all be happy together? At least write to me, and under all changes and circumstances, believe I love you tenderly and sincerely.
There is no letter or memorandum to show the exact time when Sir Charles and Lady
Morgan quitted the family of Lord
Abercorn, to begin housekeeping for themselves, nor the immediate occasion
that gave rise to it. The splendid slavery of her life was a position Lady
Morgan found untenable, and it is probable that after her marriage she felt
less inclined to tolerate the fine ladyism of the Marchioness than when she was in the position of a young lady. The
separation took place, however, without any break in their friendly relations, though the
intimacy gradually subsided. Lady Morgan was always anxious that
Sir Charles should exert himself and not settle down into indolent
comfort. For herself, activity and independence of mind and body were indispensable, and
there is no doubt she exerted all her influence over Sir Charles
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They went to stay with Sir Arthur and Lady Clarke, until they found a house to suit them. Eventually they found a house in Kildare Street—not large, but pleasant, and with some pretensions to a handsome appearance. Lady Morgan had the pleasure of fitting up her library after the fashion she had imagined and described in her Novice of St. Dominic, years ago,—the story that was begun when she and her sister were with their father in Kilkenny.
The prospects of Sir Charles and Lady Morgan were tolerable, but not brilliant, as Sir Charles had his practice entirely to establish. But this change from a courtly to a city life was the best event that had ever befallen him. The constant intercourse with the brilliant, active mind of his wife, quickened his faculties, and called out the capabilities which had lain dormant or had fallen into disuse. He obtained the appointment of physician to the Marshalsea, and succeeded, in a reasonably short time, in establishing a tolerable practice.
A few years after his marriage, Sir
Charles published a work called Outlines of the Physiology of
Life, setting forth psychological opinions, boldly averred, and distinctly
stated, instead of being put forward as hypothesis or left to inference. It was not an age
of philosophic tolerance. Science was expected to be strictly orthodox in its theology. The
work provoked a storm of opposition and censure, both religious and secular;
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