I cannot go to bed without writing to you tho my head is very bad. Oh my Love—how anxious & agitated I feel about our dear Loo. I trust the last accounts being so good may give every hope. My dearest Love I cannot express what I feel & suffer for him & how terrible it is to have no means of intelligence. Do not think I am selfish enough to think of my own anxiety only. I do indeed feel yours from my very heart. I dare not rest on the idea of what he has suffered—indeed they have kept the greatest part of the letters from me to-night least it should encrease my head ach. You know how I love him.
| 36 | LADY MELBOURNE AND |
Wedy. I was so overcome with the shock that they have never given me the detail’d account. I cannot at all calm myself & I own I see everything in the most gloomy way: may heaven preserve him, but I fear the danger is still very great. We wish’d to have set out tomorrow on my account as the suspence & anxiety of not hearing is so terrible but the things could not be got ready. My dearest Love—How shall we meet? Will it be in misery or reliev’d from this terrible misfortune? Believe me no one can feel for you or love you more tenderly than I do. God bless you d[ea]r d[ea]r Love. I cannot write.
D[uke] of Devonshire] is amazingly good to me & indeed feels himself the greatest anxiety.
